The Hour Podcast

Episode 185 - Lunchables: An American Charcuterie Board

We’re back!  How do you like your milk? Animal Free?  Well one company sure hopes you like their molecularly identical “cheese” they’ve grown.  A box of heads go missing in Denver.  A kindergartner sends a teacher to the hospital.  They’ve replaced that teacher with Detective John Kimble, so it should be fine now.  A guy breaks into his friend’s mom’s house and bites her nipples in an attempt to seduce her.  Finally, Harvey Weinstein has been smuggling Milk Duds, and not just in his tighty whiteys.  It’s been two weeks, but we’re glad you’re here, and welcome back to The Hour.

Episode 184 - The Best Place For Beaver Embezzlement

How’s your Wordle going today?  This week, a teacher somehow still doesn't know doing things in blackface with kids is bad.  Police in the UP of Michigan want you to calm down with the crimes until they’re ready.  A woman flicks off the police then drives away on a suitcase before being caught and shitting in the back seat of a squad car.  People in Louisiana confuse a sink with a sinkhole.  The world of the day for one granny was Saved.  Do you have any good jokes for us?  Let us know, and welcome back to The Hour...!

Episode 183 - Honey The Bunny Loves Fish Dicks

What’s more sexy than a build a bear and ice fishing? It’s definitely not the latest episode of The Hour.  This week a physicist says that physics will make perfect capitalism.  A guy challenged a bunny to a salad eating contest, he then said “ohhhhh that waskalwy wabbit!” An American is bad with geography and threatens a local police stations.  Children protest the loss of chocolate milk, but don’t worry, they still have paste they can eat.  Finally, an Ohio mayor says that ice fishing leads to prostitution, then he ate a big bowl of corn flakes to calm himself down.  It’s almost Valentine's Day, give your sweetheart the latest episode of The Hour.

Episode 182 - A Cold RB’s

What’s your small talk opening line? On this Groundhog Day episode, a groundhog is dead!  But did his corpse see a shadow? Bette Midler insults West Virginians, and the governor embarrasses his dog to get even. The steaks are high and a buffet brawl ensues at a Golden Corral. Police violence is in the news again, this time they deliver Arbys. Brutal.  Finally, a guy does a choose your own AirBNB adventure with his AR15, but tips well, so I’m sure he’ll be welcome back.  Sadly, we saw our shadow so that means at least six more years of The Hour.

Episode 181 - Cirque Du Celine

Hey, are you a new listener? Welcome, and we’re sorry, but this is also the greatest podcast in the world.  This week, A Michigan woman found out that she won three million dollars by checking her spam folder.  A lady tries to buy a kid at Walmart, but surprisingly it wasn’t made in China.  A sperm bank is running on empty because they’re not F-DIC insured.  Monkeys escape after an accident, but all were safely recovered so they could be euthanized.  Finally, China doesn’t like the way Fight Club ended so they changed it.  Now do Quantum Leap. At this point, are we just an audiobook? Consider that, and welcome back to The Hour.

Episode 180 - It’s Just Sparkling Mayonnaise

Do you all still have that U2 album that was sent to everyone on earth for free? Talk about relevant.  This week we learn that people think you’re way more hot if you put on a mask.  A guy said Covid made his dick small, but insists that it’s never happen before. The FDA is freeing French dressing, but no one has liked it since they changed the name to Freedom Dressing.  A speed skater is killed by mad cow, but was is MuRdEr? Finally, a Japanese firefighter gets his pay docked because of his Youtube gamer channel. It’s another episode so go EeEeEeEeEeEeEeEasy on us, and welcome back to The Hour.

Epsiode 179 - The Sewer That Is Her Mouth

What keeps you going? I hope it’s not a Big Mac. Well, a 106-year-old granny says she made it this far on Big Macs and Jesus.  A grocery store chain in England decided that milk doesn’t need expiration dates, if you want to know if something is bad, just give it the Ol’ Biden sniff.  A badger uncovered a bunch of Roman coins, but then blows them all at the arcade. Scientists discovered that many more animals than originally thought can laugh, but they didn’t discover that from having them listen to our show.  Finally, cats are assholes, but that’s nothing new.  Welcome back to The Hour.

Episode 178 - It’s Not a RIM Job, It’s a RIM Career

For $10 a month we’ll give you four free podcasts.  This week, a bunch of rowdy Canadians are trapped in Mexico, someone needs to do something because they can only survive for a week or so without Tim Hortons.  They’re putting an Alexa in the new Orion ships going to the Moon, because sure, they work great here on Earth so we should totally use them to run a spaceship.  KFC is rolling out Beyond Meat fried chicken.  I mean, it can’t be worse.  The Blackberry is officially dead, which is a surprise because we thought it died years ago. Finally, the Pope thinks it’s selfish to not have kids and instead have pets.  I mean, what will the priests do without kids, if you know what I mean… Welcome back to The Hour.

Episode 177 - The Pie-Rates of the Caribbean OR How Much Is Canadian Butter

Hey, how are those resolutions going so far? Have you resolved to listen to The Hour every week? We’re starting it off strong with a bunch of anti-vaxxers having it their way at a Burger King, and their way is locked up in a jail, but don’t worry they all got one surprise onion ring. A guy gets caught in Iowa on his way to from crazy town to Washington where he says he was going to “fight evil.” Ann Arbor residents can smoke pot, take mushrooms, but put the glue away, because sniffing it will get you a fine and some jail time. Thieves in Canada make off with 22 tons of butter, or as Paula Dean calls it, a day's supply. Finally, a grey squirrel goes on a rampage in Wales before it was humanely caught and then murdered. Should Should auld acquaintance be forgot? Maybe, but don’t forget about The Hour.

 

 

Episode 176 - This TV Is Not Going To Lick Itself

Hey, this podcast isn’t going to listen to itself.  In this not at all special Christmas edition, Canadians are naming their snow plows. A guy wins a court case and gets workers comp for falling down his own stairs while working from home. A gang of otters attacks a British guy in SIngapore, but I’m sure it was just a protest of British colonialism, so he deserved it. North Korea is forcing its people not to laugh in respect for the death of their previous leader, but like, they weren’t going to laugh anyway.  Finally, a Japanese professor has invented a lickable tv, which has Arbys very nervous that people might be able to taste their food before ordering.  So this is Christmas, and it’s also The Hour.